The Next Chapter

Pope Francis has declared the year 2015 "The Year for Consecrated Life" and has called upon those living such consecrated lives as monks, nuns and even lay oblates to witness to the world about the value and beauty of such a life.  

As you may know, I had the opportunity to participate secular Carmel for six years with the Carmelites at Holy Annunciation Byzantine Catholic Monastery, a place which had beckoned my heart from the time I was in my teens.  I had entertained the idea of actually entering the community as a nun while I was in college, but upon asking the Lord what His will was regarding this decision, I was promptly and most assuredly redirected.  My purpose in life is most certainly, maternity.  Once this became clear to me, I set the desire to enter Carmel aside.  It was always tucked away inside my heart only to take root and grow there much to my surprise and confusion, until I learned of the secular order.  How wonderful this would be!  Like having my cake and eating it too!  But this new tug on my heart came at what some would consider to be the most unusual time of my life.  The youngest of our five children were one year old twin girls, and the other children were only 5, 7, and 9.  After discussing it with my husband and calling the president of the community, I attended a meeting.  I took a few months to discern, and six months later I received my secular habit and began formation.  I began the studies, the recitation of the Divine Office, reading the works of the Carmelite saints, and the practice of mental prayer...I have always loved mental prayer.  This is what led me to seek the secular order in the first place!  It was perfect!  Some time later I made temporary promises, and was nearly ready to make a final, life-long promise, when suddenly, I was forced to take a leave of absence.  My husband became aware of an illness which had rendered him (temporarily, thanks be to God!) somewhat disabled and he needed my help at home.  I could not leave him with the children to attend the meetings, and found it difficult to make the proper commitment to the community, so with a broken heart, I had to leave. That was several years ago.  By the time my husband had recovered and I was ready to go back, a visit to my spiritual mother at the monastery revealed that my return to the life in Carmel that I had loved and sorely missed, may not have been God's plan.  Mother had asked me to be patient and await her instructions because the entire monastery was working on a plan for their future, and she wanted me to be a secular part of that future, but not until they had their plan in place.  So I began a vigil.  

Now that my first full year of blogging has been completed, and I've shared the ways that my family observes the liturgical calendar for a full liturgical cycle, I decided that this year, I'd like to take it in another direction.  I would like to chronicle my experiences as a Byzantine wife and mother as I strive to become a secular Byzantine Cistercian oblate.   I'm eager to learn how to strengthen my relationship with Christ and His Church in this way, and to live more authentically as a Byzantine Catholic oblate, as I'll be starting from scratch as a novice once again.  I look forward to analyzing the things I'll learn in order to teach my own children how to be better Christians.  I'd love to use this forum to share these thoughts with you.  My formation begins at Holy Annunciation in January and I can hardly wait for the first meeting.  Pray for me, and for the two souls entering with me as we are pioneers!  I'll be back to tell you all about it.